Prequel: The Letter
Rahul tried to shut out the noise. His friends and relatives were going berserk outside, egged on by uninhibited amounts of liquor. A moment ago, he too was part of the crowd, dancing without a care in this world when once again her memory flitted by. He somehow managed to disengage from the crowd and entered his room. It was ironic that he would think of her now, now when his life was going to change forever. He thought back to the crazy, heady days straight after college, the high of the first paycheck and of the weird quiet girl who was always lost within herself.
He didn’t recollect how they had become acquainted. He just knew that there was something about her, something that he couldn’t put a finger on. They weren’t in touch now, he just saw her randomly at some common friend’s wedding. She was still the same quiet girl, who needed to be prodded to speak, who liked to listen, whose forehead was always creased, probably weighing a million ideas simultaneously. He wondered for the umpteenth time why he was thinking about her.
He knew she was a writer now. A smile slowly formed on his face as he read her blog. Yes, he thought you do zone out while others are speaking…At this point, he couldn’t get her face out of his mind. He began typing…
I don’t know why I am writing this now. Honestly, I don’t know why. Maybe, it is because lately, I have been thinking about you. Do you remember that day…you, me and Anoop had gone to get rolls for everyone. You were annoyed about something and had reluctantly come. We were in an auto rickshaw, it was the rainy season and the wind was blowing hard. And all journey you were busy brushing off your hair from you face with your eyes closed. There was something about you in those minutes that I still haven’t been able to forget. Had your eyes been open, you would have realised that I was gaping at you like an idiot.
Do you remember the little fights we used to have or the puzzles we used to solve together or minutes we spent together post lunch. I know I pestered you way too much but I just loved the expressions on your face. I loved the way you would get annoyed, then slowly the corners of your mouth would twitch and you would break into a magnificent smile that lit up your face. You just couldn’t stay mad for long, well unless you were really really mad.
I tried to keep my distance, to stay away from you. I had a girlfriend then, if you remember. But there was a mystery associated with you, with your reserved that nature that challenged me each time I saw you. I wanted to know the real you, to break down the multiple barriers you had created around yourself because I knew you were something special. But at the same time I knew that maybe I was not that special. You needed to be with someone who was so much more smarter, so much more spontaneous.
If you hadn’t left, I don’t think I had it in me to stay away from you. Even with the distance, it was difficult. But I had to handle my existing relationship and I knew you would never like to be the one to break it up, willingly or unwillingly. So, well we grew apart.
When my relationship broke, I thought about calling you everyday. But maybe, I was waiting for you to call. You didn’t even call once. When we met, you were so aloof, so disinterested like you had forgotten me completely. You looked like you had been dragged there against your will. You wall was back and I couldn’t penetrate it in mere hours that we saw each other. Slowly, even the phone calls and chats grew minimal and I learnt to look at you but not look at you.
But, now, two days before my wedding, here I am, still thinking about you. I am crazy, aren’t I……..
“Rahul…RAHUL…what the hell are you doing here man, come everyone is calling you outside,” roared Anoop.
“Coming..”, said Rahul as he hit the delete button before walking back to the celebrations outside.